This sermon is part of our Inescapable series. Inescapable is a 12 part series that studies the Gospel of Matthew and its messages. You can watch all 12 here.
Sermon Manuscript:
This morning we are talking about sex. Welcome to North Village Church in Austin. I know we have young people in the room but our passage this morning talks about sex, adultery, lust, therefore, we are going to talk about those things on Sunday morning also.
I know every parent might not be ready for conversations about sex but I would encourage you to get ready. Conversations about sex are best in the home, so get ready to have those conversations early and often.
I would keep the conversations short. I would make the conversations frequent and I would start the conversations as early as 5 years of age.
We want to start those conversations early because sex is widely discussed in our culture. We see sex on television, movies, magazines, social media, commercials, songs, literature; the topic of sex is constant.
The primary reason we see sex in our culture so much today is because of the sexual revolution in the 1960’s. I guess somebody thought sex was in jail and in the 1960’s people decided sex needed to be set free!
As a result, we saw sex liberation, sexual expression, sex positivity, so that the bonds of marriage were no longer necessary in our culture.
The birth control pill was introduced in 1960 to avoid pregnancy. Women were encouraged to express their sexual desires just like men but 60 years later it still seems like our culture is still confused about sex.
I was just listening to a podcast on the sexual revolution being discussed by women without any biblical foundations and they were all saying, “Maybe we’ve taken this sexual revolution too far?”
Isn’t that interesting? These are women who have loved the sexual revolution and all of them were saying, “But maybe some guardrails would be nice?”
What do we do when we are told everything is sexually acceptable but instead of creating freedom it is creating confusion? An article in the LA Times in August made these claims:
- Millennials and Gen Z’ers are having less sex than their parents and grandparents at their age.
- There is an increase in abstinence over the last 10 years.
- The decline has been taking place over the last two decades.
The sexual revolution promised sexual freedom but somehow, we are still looking for answers. This morning I am suggesting God’s Word has answers on how to approach all of life, even around sex.
I am sure the subject of sex on a Sunday morning will bring up a variety of emotions, so I want to remind us on the front end, when God’s Word talks about sex, there is hope in Jesus.
Every human being has had a variety of sexual experiences that fall short of God’s intended purpose, including myself, and Jesus has come to bring hope.
Jesus knows the secret things of our heart. Jesus knows the things we have done and the things that have been done to us, things we hope nobody ever finds out, and Jesus has come to bring healing. I need you to hear that this morning. Jesus comes to bring forgiveness.
Jesus comes to take our sexual shortcomings upon Himself at the cross, Jesus comes to conquer our sexual shortcomings through the resurrection, so that through faith in Jesus we are made clean, we are made pure and we are invited to live in His kingdom on earth as it is in heaven. With that in mind, let’s look at verses 27-28:
Matthew 5:27-28, “27 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery’; 28 but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”
In Matthew chapters 1-4 we see Jesus is someone who is verified by the Scriptures, validated by the Father, so that in Matthew 5 Jesus is standing before the disciples, crowds of men and women watching from afar and in verses 1-20 Jesus is inviting those who are listening to enter into His kingdom on earth as it is in heaven.
His invitation is a mystical invitation. It’s a supernatural invitation, so that when you read verses 1-20 you have to ask the question, “How does someone enter into His kingdom of heaven on earth?” In verse 20 Jesus assumes our question and answers…
Matthew 5:20, “20 “For I say to you that unless your righteousness surpasses that of the scribes and Pharisees, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven.”
Do you see answer? It isn’t our sexual imperfections that will keep us from entering the kingdom of heaven. It isn’t a misstep here or there that keep us from entering the kingdom of heaven. In verse 20 Jesus says, “You need to have a righteousness that surpasses the scribes and the Pharisees.” What does that mean?
The scribes and the Pharisees were the religious leaders of the day. The scribes and the Pharisees were supposed to be the people who were living holy lives, therefore, how is the common person off the street supposed to attain a righteousness that surpasses the scribes the Pharisees?
The idea is that a good Jewish man or woman in the first century might have thought, “Surely I deserve to live in His kingdom on earth as it is in heaven.”
After all, I am of Israel, I am of Abraham, we are the chosen people of God, we’ve lived a good life, so that Jesus is saying, “No, if you want to enter into His kingdom on earth as it is in heaven, you need to be perfect!”
Listen to me, when Jesus uses this type of language He isn’t giving us a spiritual challenge. Jesus is using His words like that of a mirror to see our imperfections and our desperate need for a Savior. Does that make sense?
It’s why Jesus says in Matthew 9, “It’s not the healthy who need a physician, it’s the sick.” It’s in this context Jesus speaks these words:
Matthew 5:27-28, “27 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery’; 28 but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”
Do you see the pattern? Just in case there was someone thinking to themselves, “I am a pretty good person. Maybe I am righteousness enough to enter into His kingdom? Maybe I deserve to enter into His kingdom?” In verse 27 Jesus says, “Let’s talk about your sexual thoughts.” Can you imagine inviting Jesus over for Thanksgiving with friends and family?
First the word “adultery” is a sexual relationship between a married man and woman with someone who isn’t their spouse. Does that make sense?
At this point, in verse 27, Jesus assumes everyone listening to His words would agree the adulterer doesn’t deserve to enter into His kingdom.
But listen to me, none of us deserve to enter into His kingdom. This is the point of Jesus’ words. It’s why Jesus raises the bar in verse 28, “But I say to you, anyone who looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery in his heart.”
Remember Jesus has just described in His kingdom on earth. Jesus is assuming the overarching question, “How does one enter into the Kingdom of God?”
And Jesus says, “You need to be perfect! Don’t ever get angry at anyone (vs. 21). Don’t ever call anyone a fool (vs. 22). Don’t every commit adultery (vs. 27). And don’t ever lust after anyone (vs. 28).
The word “lust” means to desire someone sexually so that anytime our mind wanders about someone else sexually and marinates on those thoughts sexually, in the eyes of God, we’re just as guilty as the adulterer.
In our day today, we carry around a device in our pocket that allows us to search out any sexual thought we can imagine, so you know the people in our day are definitely going to fall short.
But these guys are in the first century. They didn’t have showers and fragrances and Jesus is still making the point, men and women fall into lust easily.
Listen to me, Jesus is pressing in on this conversation because humanity has an amazing ability to see the faults in others but overlook our own, right?
We can watch something on the news about someone’s sexual desires being put on display, shake our head in disgust and conveniently overlook short comings in our own life, right?
We might look down with disgust at the lack of character in our politicians and then walk in the room and gossip about someone in our family with no problems.
We are shocked by the greed of corporate America but somehow overlook the greed in our life, therefore, Jesus is casting a wide net so as to expose our need for a Savior.
This is especially applicable in our day today with virtue signaling, right? Look at my environmentally friendly car. Look at my organic food. Look at my compassion for other people that I posted on my social media.
Do we really think our lives are morally superior to others? Do we really think our values are more just and righteous than others?
Do we really think we have it all figured out while the rest of the world struggles? No, Jesus is making the point, the kingdom of heaven has come near, and unless we see the brokenness of our souls we will never enter into His kingdom. Let’s look at verses 29-30:
Matthew 5:29-30, “29 If your right eye makes you stumble, tear it out and throw it from you; for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30 If your right hand makes you stumble, cut it off and throw it from you; for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to go into hell.”
Listen to me, in our non-denominational church in Austin we take the bible literally but in verses 29-30 Jesus is being hyperbolic. When you study the bible look at the style of the writing and we see prompts to take the wording metaphorically because the eye and the hand isn’t what causes us to fall short of God’s glory. Does that make sense?
You can cut off your hand and gouge out your eye, but it isn’t going to solve our problem of lust because we still have another eye and another hand. We still have thoughts. We still have feet. The problem isn’t our body parts. The problem is the brokenness of our soul.
Remember the overarching question, “How does one enter into the Kingdom of God?” Jesus says, “You need to be perfect!” Don’t ever get angry at anyone. Don’t ever call anyone a fool. Don’t every commit adultery. Don’t ever have a lustful thought after anyone. You must be perfect!
You are supposed to read verses 29-30 with this thought like, “This is impossible!” Do you remember the famous passage in Matthew 19 when Jesus is speaking to the rich young ruler who asks, “How do I inherit eternal life?”
Jesus said, “Keep My commandments.” The rich young ruler says, “Which one?” As if he might have kept some, so Jesus says, “You shall not murder, commit adultery, steal, bear false witness and honor your father and mother.”
Do you know the response of the rich young ruler? He says, “All these things I have kept, what am I lacking?” Jesus said, “Sell everything, follow Me.” Jesus goes right to the heart. The next verse says, “The young man went away grieving because he owned much property.”
Jesus wasn’t giving him a challenge. Jesus was exposing his broken soul. The rich young ruler was disqualified at the commandments. The rich young ruler was disqualified at birth. The rich young ruler should have fallen to his knees and cried out, “That’s impossible! I can’t keep those commandments.”
It’s why back in verse 17 Jesus says, “I didn’t come to abolish the law, I came to fulfill the law.” Jesus is the One who keeps the commandments. Jesus is the One who lives a perfect life. Jesus takes our imperfections at the cross. Jesus conquers our imperfections through His resurrection, so that through faith in Jesus we are given His righteousness and ushered into His kingdom. That’s the gospel!
Listen, it’s possible these words around sex are triggering thoughts and memories. I get it. As I studied the passage throughout the week there were memories popping into my head that I hadn’t thought about in a long time. Memories of pain. Memories of sadness.
But God’s Word isn’t written to evoke shame and sadness, so that we sit in shame and sadness but instead God’s Word is exposing our shame and sadness and then pointing us to our desperate need for Jesus.
Because there is hope only in Jesus. That’s not just what I am supposed to say as a pastor. That’s what I have experienced in Jesus.
I didn’t grow up around Jesus. I didn’t grow up going to church but through Jesus and His Word I saw the brokenness of my soul, the brokenness of humanity and Jesus has come to take my brokenness upon Himself at the cross and conquer it through the resurrection.
Listen to me, it is Jesus’ life, death and resurrection that is still taking my shame and sadness today and still calling me His today, because my hope is not in my righteousness, but in His. Does that make sense?
I remember a number of years ago there was a man who showed up at my front door on a Saturday morning in tears. This was a man that I loved, a man that walked with Jesus but the night before alcohol got the better of this man and he made some decisions that put in jeopardy everything he held dear, and he came to my house in tears.
In that moment I am embarrassed to say my first response, as he poured out his heart was, “What were you thinking?” That man lowered his head in tears and said, “I don’t know, I don’t know” over and over. In that moment, his shame and sadness were exposed and I just doubled down.
But by God’s grace my next response was to wrap my arms around him and say, “God loves you. Jesus has died for your sins. Jesus has given you His righteousness. Jesus calls you His for eternity.”
That doesn’t mean we go through life doing what we want because Jesus will forgive us. It means in Christ, we are in His kingdom. In Christ, we live for His kingdom and when we fall short we remind ourselves and we remind others we are only in His kingdom because of Christ. He is our hope!
Theological Training: That’s the part of the gospel we can’t hear enough. That’s why we are providing this Theological Training in January. The deadline is December 15th. The number of people needed for us to host the training is at least 10 people and we have 5 as of today. If you want to know the gospel well enough so that you speak the gospel over yourself and others, you need to commit to Theological Training. Let’s look at verses 31-32:
Matthew 5:31-32, “31 “It was said, ‘Whoever sends his wife away, let him give her a certificate of divorce’; 32 but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except for the reason of unchastity, makes her commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.”
In verses 31-32 Jesus continues to press in on the soul and speaks to divorce. And again, it’s possible some of these words are triggering a lot of thoughts this morning but it’s no accident divorce comes up in this part of the teaching.
When people are wrapped up in hardened hearts we are going to struggles in marriage. When people are wrapped up in lust and adultery we are going to struggles in marriage, and in our culture today we have a very low view of marriage.
Today, it isn’t uncommon to hear people say, “I don’t ever want to get married.” People say things like, “Humans aren’t designed for monogamous relationships.” And we applaud those answers like they are wise.
And if people do get married, sometimes it seems like people are more excited about the wedding than the marriage, so that today divorce is widely embraced but in verses 31-32 it’s as if Jesus is saying, “I didn’t establish my kingdom on earth so that adultery, lust and divorce would be normal.”
Jesus came to make us new. Jesus came to make us whole. Jesus came to bring us together. Jesus came to bring reconciliation, so that we not only experience reconciliation between us and the Father so that we can also experience reconciliation with one another.
How could we, who are in Christ, experience forgiveness through Christ yet withhold forgiveness from our spouse in marriage? It doesn’t mean divorce is impossible. There might be considerations when it comes to adultery, abuse or addiction but in Christ, we want to hold marriage in high regard.
Really marriage isn’t a good enough word because the bible describes marriage as a covenant. Biblical marriage isn’t just a legal document between two people. Biblical marriage is a covenant and a covenant creates a relationship between two people that is far greater than a legal document.
A covenant in marriage isn’t about a wedding so you can throw a party or simply getting your needs met by someone else. A covenant in marriage is when you are committed to someone that is more important than your needs and desires. This is the beauty of God’s Word.
You see, in our culture, sexual intimacy between two people is typically two people getting their needs met and when their needs are no longer being met, the sexual intimacy is no longer necessary. Then we discard one another and wonder why there is so much confusion.
When sexual intimacy is experienced between two people you are vulnerable to one another. You are exposed to that person and if our commitment to one another, in our most vulnerable position, is based on our needs being met, then we are going to get shredded.
But God’s Word teaches us sex is designed to take place in the commitment of covenant marriage, so that sexual intimacy isn’t at the beginning of the relationship but instead sexual intimacy becomes the result of something instead of the beginning of something. Does that make sense?
Let’s invite our worship team to the front. Let’s lower the lights. In Matthew 5 Jesus is inviting all of us into His kingdom on earth as it is in heaven. The entrance into His kingdom is perfection and Jesus has come to give you His perfection by grace through faith in Him.
If you have never done that, do that this morning. Confess with your mouth Jesus is Lord. Believe in your heart that Jesus resurrected from the dead. Jesus is the One who fulfills the law. Jesus is the One who gives you His righteousness. Trust in Him!
As we enter into His kingdom and live in His kingdom, our hope isn’t in our sexual purity. Our hope isn’t in our moral superiority. Our hope is in Jesus.
Even in marriage, our ultimate hope in marriage is Jesus. I need all of us to hear that this morning. Our ultimate hope in life isn’t finding that special someone. If we are single in Christ, we aren’t lacking. We have Christ! If we are in a marriage that is struggling, we aren’t lacking. We are hurting, we are struggling, weeping, but we aren’t lacking because we have Christ! Trust in Him!
North Village Church
This sermon is brought to you by North Village Church, a non-denominational church in Austin. established in 2009 and built around Jesus and Bible teaching.
Are you looking for a church in Austin? At North Village Church we put Jesus at the center of our church family. We worship together every Sunday at 10:30am, encourage Christ centered fellowship through groups, and host special events such as Bible studies and Theological Training, to ensure that we are rooted in in God’s Word. We also serve our local community in association with several Austin based organizations.
North Village Church is made up of professionals, married couples, singles, and families who are wanting to experience the life-transforming power of Jesus. If you are a family with children or teens, we can support you with either or both our Kids Ministry and Youth Ministry.
Check out our North Village Church calendar highlights such as our Christmas Eve Service and Easter Sunday Service.
You are welcome to contact us if you would like more information.
NVC Online
Unable to attend this Christian Church in Austin? Don’t worry, because, through God’s provision, we have created NVC online, an Online Church streaming a worship service every Sunday from 10:30am Central Time. You can also watch our short, powerful sermons on demand and follow us on Instagram for daily Christ centered content.